Poking the Bear

My wife was in the shower and I said "Hey, wait, we made it through terrible Tuesday!  Way to go, us!"
She replied with "Why was Tuesday so terrible?"
I said "Because you and I both had gigs at night, the kids started back to school, we had all that other... well just because.  Congrats us!"
Her reply "Sure"
Her next reply "Oh, that makes today hump day" ;)

Not 3 seconds later came the wails from the kitchen- the children, after having woken up and showered and gotten dressed, decided that play nice time was over.

There were shouts of "He slammed the refrigerator door on me" "Well she slammed it open on ME!"

"OH MY GOD, BRADY!" "Well there are 2 other seats at the table, you don't have to sit at that one" "DAAAAAAAAAAAAAD! BRADY WON'T MOVE HIS LUNCH!"

Here were a couple of my brilliant solutions:
A) You will both sit on the tile floor and eat your breakfast, if you can't sit at the table together.  And I already gave you enough chances.
B) You will use the most sickeningly sweet voice with each other for the rest of the day. If I hear one bit less than SUPER nice, including not only words but also inflection, you will be grounded. Both of you. Together.  And I will make you watch the movie of MY choice, sitting next to each other on HALF of the couch.

I think it's pretty freakin smart.  The eat breakfast while sitting on the floor was simply genius.

The wife says "See what happens when you congratulate yourself for getting through terrible Tuesday?"